Our 20th wedding anniversary occurred during our time in New York and we decided to spent a weekend away from the kids and go to the fabled Mohonk Mountain House. The weather was not accommodating but we very much enjoyed Mohonk. It was a calm and relaxing weekend with one exception.
That one exception is that all of the rooms at Mohonk come with a fireplace and all of the necessities to build a fireplace. Now gentle reader, you may ask why that this might be an exception. Recall that I am an Eagle Scout and skilled at building a multitude of different types of fires. I quickly analyzed the dimensions of the fireplace and built the best possible fire given the constraints. All of the silent warnings firing in your mind right now did not fire in my mind. Alas, in a match between Eagle Scout Curt and the fireplace, Curt won.
On a positive front, the fire was contained. On a positive front, the fire design was most efficient. On a negative front, the smoke from said efficient fire design was overwhelming the exhaust. At first, we checked to ensure the fluke was open to its maximal extent. It was. We then opened the balcony windows in the rain in hopes that the warm smoke would be attracted to the cold weather outside the window. It was about then that the fire alarm for the hotel went off. Eileen and I then attempted, unsuccessfully, to franticly accelerate the flow of smoke to the balcony. It was at about this point that there was an urgent knock at the door.
Armed with large axes to break down the door was a group of firemen ready to deal with the situation. Alas, Curt’s efficient fireplace design was no match for the fire extinguishers. I thanked the firemen and asked if this happened often. They smiled broadly and confirmed that it did. For reasons that remain unclear to me to this day, the maids did not give us firewood for the remainder of our stay.
We look forward to returning to Mohonk to enjoy the hiking trails when the weather is better and to see if Curt is under a temporary suspension of building fires or a lifetime ban.